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Antifreeze(continued) "And it's not just one night for them. It's three, five, even ten. The Rands right across the street — you've seen Dan switch to the Kia, and leave the Buick for Marion. That's when you know he's with the swarm, and God bless his humble flea-infested soul, he never ever complains!" Derek removed his jeans, tossed them onto a chair, and turned down the blankets on his side of the bed. "An exquisite Chippendale!" Jill whined. "I ask you once — just once! — in ten months of marriage. Did you know the wives around here brag about kicking their husbands out of bed and get high by one-upping each other? 'I sent Bill up the freezer for five days,' one will gloat. 'Big deal!' another will snicker. 'I busted Tom for a two-week term, and he's still on thin ice.' And I can't even cool you for one night!" "Enough, Jill," Derek groaned, as he got into bed. "Let's —" "What do you suppose those women would think of me if they knew I couldn't ice you? And one of these days they are going to ask — you don't know what they're like. Am I supposed to whimper he won't go? I can just hear it — 'You've got a Chippendale and he still won't go? What the hell's wrong with your marriage?'" You haven't a single solitary clue what they're like." "I'm tired, Jill," Derek yawned. "Very, very tired." "And that's just the beginning because the husbands will find out you won't go, and one by one they'll get sledgehammers and wipe their sofas off the face of the earth. And I'll be blamed. Those wives won't speak to me, not by phone, email or intermediary, won't drive our kids to Brownies if we ever make any. They'll claim I have no say in my own marriage and cold-shoulder me with tepid coffee for putting their freezers out of business. Why should I have to endure that?" Derek pulled the blankets over his chest, folded his hands under his head. Jill sat up, propped her elbows on her knees and buried her face in her hands. The stalemate endured. Eventually Jill mumbled: "Your mother told me you always refused to go to your room when you misbehaved. Derek, listen... please, listen. Just go out for a half hour, just thirty minutes. It's the least you can do for me, and it'd mean so much. " "Not a half hour, not a half minute, not even a half second," Derek snorted. "Because then I could say I froze you and end my apprenticeship. Because right now I can't contribute enough to our gatherings for full-fledged membership, and they'll say I'm housebroken if word gets out that we never sleep separately. You really have no inkling of what the hell it's like to be their friend." "Repeat, not a half hour, not a half —" "Because then, after a half hour I could parole you back in here — all right, Derek. I'm really not asking for much because there's beautiful furniture and velvet wallpaper out there — all right then, Derek, I'll go!" Derek turned at his wife, snapped: "Oh no you won't!" 
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