Lady in Red (continued) |
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We reached the playground, and the rest of the children swarmed the equipment, not unlike the way the ants had swarmed us at the comer. I remained with Ben, David, and Emily who chose a spot under a gargantuan oak instead of the swings or the slide. As we settled under the cool shade of the tree, the three of them realized that they were the unlucky ones who were going to be stuck with me for the next thirty minutes. I say this because I noticed Ben looking at me from behind his gold-rimmed spectacles and then to Emily as if to say, "Come on, Emily. Make the nerd go away." She was not the kindest person in world, but I have a feeling she felt sorry for me. She only shrugged her shoulders at Ben, telling him, "It just for a little while. Let her stay." And stay I did. Looking back, I wish she would have screamed at me to leave them alone or to get out of their spot. I wish every day that's what she had done. We sat in a circle, David, Ben, Emily, and me, and they continued bickering over a subject I knew not. Then something totally unexpected happened. Emily turned to me and asked, "What do ya think, Helen? Ya think she's really for real?" I didn't have the foggiest notion who she meant. My body temperature
rose as anxiety crept into my veins; I didn't want to ask her who she
meant, but I didn't want to give the wrong answer and get laughed at either.
Either way I would have come out looking stupid or uncool. I must have
taken a long time to answer, because David added in his squeaky, annoying
little-boy voice, "So what do you think? Do you believe in Bloody
Mary?" "I bet she doesn't even know who Bloody Mary is!" Ben cried arrogantly. "I bet you don't even know, dummy!" Emily rebutted,
and rolled her eyes at him. In return, he stuck his tongue out at her.
How mature we all were back then! "I know who she is! My Uncle Steve said she useta be
the queen of England, but she's dead and she doesn't come back
if you call her name in the mirror like you morons think," David
commented matter-of-factly. David was the kind of kid who thought he knew
everything about everything, who thought everything had to have a rational
explanation, because the world, of course, is a rational place. Or so
we're taught to think and do think until something opens our eyes and
changes our minds. Ben argued, "That's stupid! My sister said she was the devil's wife, and if you say her name three times in the mirror she comes and sometimes she kills whoever called her up from H-E-L-L." We were in fourth grade and not permitted to say that word. Spelling worked just fine and dandy. "You're both stupid!" Emily scolded. "Tina told me she's
a ghost who got killed a long time ago in the Indian days, and sometimes
she comes back to scare people when they call her name in the mirror three
times." "So what do you think, Helen? Who do you think she is? Ya think Bloody Mary is real?" It's funny how I usually yearned to be talked to, to be a part of things so badly, yet I did not want to talk about this. "Well, I-I-I dunno if ghosts are real," I forced myself to answer, as I turned my face away from Emily and the group and suddenly became very interested in my shoelaces. I was being honest. I had never even heard of this Bloody Mary lady five minutes earlier; I didn't know if she was real or fictional. The logical part of me believed my mother. Another part of me sympathized with the goosebumps on my arms. Ben suddenly taunted obnoxiously, "I bet you're a scaredy cat! Scaredy cat! Scare-" "Let's do it," Emily interrupted with utter seriousness. "You're weird. I don't wanna spend my recess callin' some dead lady's name in a mirror. And I don't even got a mirror anyways." That was David exercising his rationalism and skeptical nature. "But there's one in the portable," Ben said, also serious. The four of us sat there. We did not move; we did not look at each other;
we did not speak. We simply pondered Emily's suggestion and Ben's comment.
"Let's do it." I was shocked, because this came from Doubting David's mouth. "1 wanna show you guys you're wrong. Let's go." They all rose, but I remained seated -- for two reasons: a) I wasn't sure I was invited, and b) I wasn't sure I wanted to go. Emily looked down at me questioningly. "You comin'?" "Or are ya too scared?" Ben added. He really was an irksome child. "I'm comin'," I replied, looking Ben directly in the eyes. "Great," he mumbled sarcastically. We strolled along in a loose blob, David at the front, Emily and I in
the center, and Ben at the rear. We tried not to draw attention to ourselves;
there would surely be trouble if we were caught in the portable building.
Now I blame it on her.
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